arctic fox
have you ever seen an arctic fox hunt for food under the snow? it's amusing to watch because they focus on the ground, then jump up and dive straight down into the snow to catch their quarry. I started this post 11/8/17, and now it's 3+ years later and I'm not sure where I was going with this. I think one of the girls was doing something similar to how an artic fox hunts, but I can't remember :(

Best part

Since i have had a relatively easy breastfeeding experience the third time around, i am counting my blessings. 

When zabelle was really little, she would give "hungry kisses" when it was time to eat. Sure, it's just a reflex, but hungry kisses are more fun. 

When she got older and started babbling, she started telling my breasts secrets. She pauses mid feeding to look right at my breast and whisper to it. I don't know what she is saying, but my breasts appreciate the kind words. 

At the moment, feedings on the bed have become joint yoga sessions. If i am lying down, she will do anything but. Downward dog is a current favorite both on and off the breast. My favorite is when i lay on my back and she climbs up, because she looks right up at me and i love her little face. 

These are all the best part about breastfeeding, with more to come. 

Goddess no more

For almost nine whole months, i was a motherly milk goddess who fed her nursling and it kept my cycle away. 

But lo, i am mortal again today, with the first spots of menses. And so it will be each month until menopause. 

It was great while it lasted! A year and a half without my period was fantastic. Plus, i still get to feed my nursling as she grows into a toddler.

I like having this third baby- i know what to expect, so there is less guessing. And in that peace of mind and confidence comes the patience to savor so much more than with the first two. 

When I Grow Up

As a kid, I dont remember aspiring to be anything when i grew up. Maybe as a really little kid, but not when i was "old enough to remember." So when the girls are future-focused, i take notice. 

Nissa has the strongest focus so far. The focus changes, but still backed by fierce determination with every shift. 

Her fist declaration was to be a paleontologist, just like doctor scott on dinosaur train. For a bit, she wanted to be a fireworks technician. Then she wanted to be a mommy and ___ . The and varied, but paleontologist stuck around for a while, also swimming instructor, gymnastics instructor, and i think guitar teacher, too. 

The latest, of which i am most proud and excited, is engineer. Her vision is almost magician-like: when she gets older, she is going to invent anything and everything. She foresees no practical limits on what she will be able to make by being an engineer, it is inspiring. I need to write some ideas down!!

Parenting win

Not only do the girls enjoy watching Dr Who, but now Nissa is saying "Oi," just like Donna. 

Mommy fail

It doesn't het much worse than this. In my haste to get to bed, i didnt take the time to make sure zabelle was in a safe spot on the bed. In the brief moment i was on the other side of the room, she flipped over and off the bed. That thud breaks my heart to remember it and ive never heard her scream like that before. I hope i never do again. 

I am sorry, zabelle, for not keeping you safe. I am glad you are ok, but i am so very sorry. 

Funny ani

Recently, Ani has really discovered her knack for wit. Not sure how intentional it is, but its been getting good.

We were leaving to go somewhere and i asked her to get buckled in on her own. I know she can do it, but she likes to ask for help holding the slack and id like her to be able to do it herself with confidence. Anyway, she pretended to try then screamed and decided she couldn't do it. On instinct i took the slack to help and asked if that was so hard. She replied "no, i screamed and then you helped." Grrr. 

Another time she was taking a bath and got soap in her eyes. Adam suggested she splash some water on her face to get the soap off. Ani replied "water got me into this mess!"

In other bath news, when i gave zabelle a bath tuesday night, she refused to lay back in the infant tub! She only wanted to sit up (i spotted her, but i hardly helped), and started enjoying splashing the water. Ducky tub time is here! 🐤