movin' right along

this pregnancy is moving so fast, it's hard to imagine i'm more than half way there already (23 weeks).

this past friday had to be one of my most fun pregnant days so far. i had a random woman walking down the street smile at me in such a warm and friendly way; i knew it had everything to do with my belly. at work i had 2 different people congratulate me on my pregnancy. . . they hadn't heard about it yet from someone else. then we went to aaron's house for dinner, where we visited with grandma, auntie linda and brian. the novelty of discussing the pregnancy hasn't worn off yet, so it's still fun for me.

it's kinda nice to be showing in this way, that people can figure it out all on their own. plus, depending on what i'm wearing, it can be more or less noticeable. it doesn't help that i seem to be carrying all in front, but in a very broad way, so i'm not very round and it's easy to chalk up to fat. i know adam thinks i worry too much about how i look, but i can't help it. in my mind, it's more observational than obsessive; i'm not upset or unhappy for not looking so pregnant in the past, but it is definitely fun to be looking more and more definitively pregnant.

it's also super duper neat to feel the baby move around. the movements are getting more noticeable and powerful. i tried the other day to get adam to be able to feel a kick, but as soon as his hand was on my belly, baby stopped moving. i know there will be plenty of time for baby watching once he/she is here, but this is such a novel experience, i hope i can get adam in on the action too.

gibson and i had a good time yesterday: we went to the beach for the first time, and it was very successful. he got to meet and run around with a bunch of new dogs and it was neat to see that once off leash, he was much better about not punching dogs in the face. he still licks male dogs' privates a bit more that i'm comfortable with, but i'm trying not to apply my human standards to his behavior too much. i even got him to go into the water; i had to walk in at first, but once he was there, he liked it (though the small wave action intimidated him a bit). after that, he'd follow other dogs in, fetch a ball out of the water, the works. he likes to bite at the water and drink it, so when he'd work up a foam around his mouth from running, i'd lead him in for a drink. i'm not sure if he'd actually swim (he did this porpoising thing, jumping around) but maybe we'll explore that for next time. since his surgery is coming up this week (for real this time, now that i know what to plan for), he'll be able to go to the montrose dog beach, which is a tad closer, but inevitably more crowded. overall, the best part for us was not only to see him clearly have a blast at the beach, but then at night, he slept so soundly!

i know it's normal, but i'm starting to get bouts of nervousness about the baby.will i find a miracle way to afford to stay home with the baby? will we make enough time to be as nurturing as we need to be, to have the baby live up to our high expectations? am i going to go crazy being away from the baby at work? will gibson like is new sibling? all i can do is acknowledge the thought and let it pass. i can do very little about my concerns now (though i'm always looking for opportunities to earn from home) and i can't let them bog me down or stress me out. i dont' work well under stress and i owe it to the baby to be as healthy and happy as possible. truly, very little good comes from worrying, so i need to keep it in check. it sounds good as i write it, but in practice, it's a bit more challenging, but i'm managing so far.