Unwelcome burden

For the first time in my childbearing life, i felt like an unwelcome burden on those around me. When I'm with other adults, I don't focus on my pregnancy, just talk about it when asked, especially with new acquaintances. 

But last night, i had someone light a bowl in the same rom as me, when i am wearing a snug fitting top and obviously showing. It wasnt until another person started opening windows and turning on fans that she thought to question her choice. I was prepared to just step outside, but the disregard was surprising. 

Eventually, Nearly every room in the house had people smoking of one sort or another. And the back yard had smokers too. It was hard to be anywhere and it stunk. No one asked me about my pregnancy, but no one really talked to me either, and i think my belly had everything to to do with it. I would never question another forty something about why they didnt have kids, why was our choice so socially crippling? Ugh. So annoying.